Songs by
Jacob Greenleaf

When I Think About You

Whenever I think about you my jaw gets tight and I'm not quite right

Nausea wells up in my throat, I start to choke and my knuckles go white

The pressure builds up in my head and I wish I were dead

Or at least far from here

The thought of that look in your eyes makes my blood pressure rise

It's just so insincere

I wish that I could forgive you, though to say you deserve it's untrue

It's just that it's bad for my health when I think about you

Whenever I look at your face I feel intensely all tense and defensive

Biting my lip while I smile and tasting the bile trying not to look pensive

I'm glad I could not make it fly cause I would rather die

Than live my life that way

I only wish that you could see how transparent to me

Are all the lies that you say

I know I'd be in the right space, if I could move past this with grace

It's just that it's hell on my nerves when I look at your face

When we have occasion to talk I have to prepare, I take deep breaths of air

Every second will seem like an hour and I'll want a shower through the whole damned affair

Your jokes will amuse you and I'll wish you just knew

How shallow and cocky you seem

But I'll stand there smiling while you feel beguiling

like I'm buying into your scheme

I'll wish I could speed up the clock; I'll stare like I've gone into shock

Cause it's torture on every occasion that we have to talk